Mommy's Gone Wild (sort of?)...

Yeah! Spring break is finally here! What will I be doing? Relaxing? Nope, I'm way too high strung. Boozing? Probably at least a little, especially if the weather is nice. Sunning myself? Even if it gets warm enough, have you seen me? Dunk Casper the Friendly ghost in a vat of Wite-Out and you have my skin color, so no, probably not, I don't need to burn my neighbors retinas with my pasty visage.

So, being the crazy OCD Nazi that I am, I have complied a list of the major tasks I would like to accomplish this week...

1. Clean out Haley's closet: Haley has gotten so many lovely new clothes, it's time to get rid of the old, too small stuff. How can I make this easier? Did I mention that she's now in the 96% for both height and weight? The pediatrician warned me at her checkup that people may expect more of her, because they will assume she's older. So, my solution? Haley and I will now share clothes. We're practically the same size. I can't wait until we fight over who gets to wear the Transformers tee shirt.

2. Wash the windows. I hate this. But I'm old school and I do it twice a year. It's particularly embarrassing because people can see me hanging out of the windows scrubbing away. How can I make this easier? Pay someone else to do it. I don't have any money really, but I can bake or cook you something...any takers?

3. Work on my resume. I'm going to a job fair at the end of the month, and I will be actively looking for a summer job. I haven't applied for a job in eight years , so this is going to be very tough. How can I make this easier? Keeping it simple. In this job market you've got to make yourself stand out. I figure I'll write "will do anything for money" over a picture of myself in last year's Halloween costume. Eh, that's sort of presumptuous of me...I'll make a sign that says, "Will sponge bathe for $" and stand on Rt. 1. Hey, I've got to get some nursing experience...

4. Yearly checkup on the BOB Revolution. The stroller seriously needs some maintenance. I estimate that since I purchased it in September 2008 I've put approximately 1500 miles on it. Really, I'm not making that up. I need to adjust the straps for my enormous 2 year old, and the tires are pretty low. I think I'm going to rotate the back two tires as well. How can I make this easier? Somehow convince the husband that I need a new one? Not going to happen.

5. Pull all the weeds out of the little plot of mulch in front of my condo. I need to make it all pretty so when my tulips bloom they can have five seconds of glory before the insane amount of direct sunlight dries them up. How can I make this easier? Burn down the whole complex. Hmmm, probably not the best idea since I'm up for reelection at the next meeting.

6. Have 5 daquiris? Oh no, we remembered to do that...